Am I Good Enough to be a Blogger? – Conversations with Anxiety #10

Snapshots of the conversations that are had between anxiety and I: the things we fight over, the discussions and debates we take part in and the struggle to reason with irrationality. Some of these are based on past events or reoccurring battles, some on more recent occasions, and some are simply extrapolations of experiences I’ve had.

Anxiety: Why do we do this ‘blogging’ thing?

Me: Do you have to ask this now? I’m trying to concentrate on writing a post.

Anxiety: You’re avoiding the question.

Me: Ufff. We blog because it’s fun, we enjoy writing, we like connecting with others, hopefully we have something at least a little worthwhile to say–

Anxiety: Ugh, really? You actually think that?

Me: …yeah? I hope so anyway.

Anxiety: And hope is enough for us to dedicate all of these hours to this?

Me: And sometimes people say we’re helping them, so I guess there’s that?

Anxiety: They don’t mean it.

Me: Hey! I think they do and that’s rude, don’t be mean to the people who support us.

Anxiety: Okay, okay, you’re right.

Me: Wow, I didn’t know you were capable of agreeing with me.

Anxiety: Not on many things.

Me: …agreed.

Anxiety: Sometimes I just don’t feel like the posts we write are any good.

Me: Aw, well, I think–

Anxiety: Actually we’re not good at writing.

Me: That’s quite–

Anxiety: We’re bad, actually, now that I think about it… Some of the stuff we publish is embarrassing. AWFUL. No one cares about it. Really, why bother? Why are you making us put ourselves out there? It’s draining. I don’t know how long I can humour you on this, it’s just–

Me: Please, don’t ruin this for me. All we can do is try our best.

Anxiety: Try our best? What if our best is laughable?

Me: Then let people laugh.

Anxiety: You really don’t care if that happens?! This whole conversation is making me sweat, thinking of all those real faces behind screens actually reading our thoughts.

Me: That’s why blogging is such a good platform for us – we don’t have to let our fear of an audience get in the way. We just write, press publish and that’s it!

Anxiety: No no, it’s too much.

Me: I think you’re being a little ungrateful.

Anxiety: Huh?

Me: You should be happy about it, a lot of the content is about you. You’re effectively the star of the show.

Anxiety: That’s EXACTLY why I don’t like it. You know I hate being the centre of attention!! You’re doing this to hurt me. And you’re making me look bad in front of everyone.

Me: …Maybe it makes you uncomfortable because you can see the reality of your decisions on my actions? And what I try to do to limit your influence?

Anxiety: Hey! You’re making me sound manipulative, controlling, emotionally abusive…

Me:

Anxiety: Oh.


Read the rest of the series here…


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86 thoughts on “Am I Good Enough to be a Blogger? – Conversations with Anxiety #10

  1. Matthew // Normal Happenings says:

    Hi Alys, first time reading your articles, but this is really good. I’m love how you’ve expressed your anxiety as a conversation, and I really feel like I can relate with you when publishing my own posts. Looking forward to following and reading your posts. Come pay my blog, Normal Happenings, a visit when you get a chance. I think you’ll like the topics as well.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Alys says:

      Thank you so much Matthew! I’m glad so many people can connect to these ideas, we’re not alone in this! Of course, I’ll go have a look now 🙂

      Like

  2. Hilary Tan says:

    Yes, blogging is a great way to do something outside of your comfort zone. ☺️ A few friends set up a blog because I do but they stopped within the same week because they lacked passion or their anxiety held them back. I think they should continue blogging and still mention it from time to time. 🤷🏼‍♀️ Just like blogging, I’m in school to develop social skills and hopefully overcome anxiety! I picked a field that anxiety wouldn’t like and I did it on purpose. Makes a good topic for anecdotal notes and reflection papers. 😂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Alys says:

      It certainly is! Ah I see, yes you definitely have to have passion to keep a blog going, it’s not easy to do! Hopefully they can overcome their anxieties. That’s a brilliant thing to do, I’ve made a similar decision by choosing to go to uni this year as a way to go against anxiety. We can’t let it make our life decisions for us! Well done to you 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • Hilary Tan says:

        University is a good challenge and definitely worth it if you know what you want to do. Don’t be afraid to do something that you wouldn’t normally do that challenges your anxiety! This is my second round, degree #2, accelerated route. My struggles fuel my passion to write and also helps me make sense of things. I have managed to come up with topics related to social anxiety, depression, broken friendships etc. because I see it all around me. There is always something to write about! 😅

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Lisa's Notebook says:

    Oh, I loved this post. But I think Anxiety needs to realise that sometimes we blog for the love of it. The sheer hell of it. And the exhilaration of putting our words out thete, no matter what! This is a lovely piece of writing, thank you for sharing xx

    Lisa | http://www.lisasnotebook.com

    Liked by 1 person

  4. allthingspopsx says:

    I was literally sat here nodding whilst reading all of this. A great post for all the overthinkers out there and people that let their anxiety make them question their actions xx

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Florence says:

    Such a good post – giving us insight into the strength of anxiety it can have on what we think! Blogging is amazing to push your boundaries and get you out of your comfort zone!

    Florence

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Liz Brannan says:

    I don’t have anxiety myself but I have this conversation with my head every single time I write a post! Just need to remember that we are doing this because we like to write and share our stories!☺️ lovely post though!

    Liz xx

    Liked by 1 person

  7. glowsteady says:

    I’ve told you a million times now how much I love the way you write these but this one is incredible! I can relate to this one so much and I don’t even suffer with anxiety! I think blogging is one of those things that causes a lot of people to doubt themselves or their content so I can’t even imagine how hard that must be for someone whose mind already likes to make them think like that. Oh and next time, tell anxiety that people really enjoy these posts, they’re so engaging. Keep up the amazing work! x

    Sophie
    http://www.glowsteady.co.uk

    Liked by 1 person

    • Alys says:

      Aw thank you so much for the really lovely words Sophie. Yes I think it is something we all struggle with, for sure. That’s lovely, thanks! x

      Like

  8. Eva says:

    This is my first time reading your posts, and wow, I love love love this, it’s so spot on with just how those of us with anxiety think. You’ve perfectly captured just how you battle yourself in your mind, and how difficult it can be to overcome and know what is real. I think even people who don’t have anxiety could relate to this, and the self-doubt blogging can often lead to, simply because it’s so easy to compare!

    http://www.whatevawears.co.uk

    Liked by 1 person

  9. the pretty poems says:

    today was the first day i ever caught myself thinking “is it worth having a blog?” which is crazy talk because i’ve always loved blogging. i loved how you wrote this.

    Liked by 1 person

      • the pretty poems says:

        I really don’t know why it came across my mind – I think it was because I was going to start a new art blog to record my art journey, and then I was wondering if any one even liked me commenting on THEIR posts, like did I seem like I was too much? Having 3 blogs. Crazy talk though! You’re right you have to fight it off

        Liked by 1 person

  10. crystalsandcurls says:

    Okay, I think this HAS to be my favourite of all of your conversations with anxiety posts! This echoes so many of my own thoughts, it’s crazy… I hope you know your anxiety is completely fucking wrong on this one; I love your blog 🙂 xx

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Sanne says:

    What a great post! I can relate to this a lot. I’ve just started blogging in a foreign language and I have a lot of anxiety about writing in a foreign language, because I’m afraid of all the mistakes I’m making all the time. But well, the only think we can do is not letting anxiety win.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. veganwanderessblog says:

    I always love these conversations. They are very relatable, especially this one for fellow bloggers I think we all have those thoughts.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Alys says:

      Aw I’m sorry you go through this too but it is a comfort knowing others think such similar things. Thank you so much for your kind words x

      Like

  13. evana says:

    This is amazing. Amazingggg. I found you from your feature on James Edgar Skye’s blog, and I must say… I’m so excited about finding you! These posts are amazing, hit straight home. Your creativity, your way of turning your anxiety, something that whoever experiences it know how much of a handful it is, into a humorous character… The star of your posts!! Ah!!! I love it. You’ve easily become one of my favorite bloggers already.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Alys says:

      Aw I’m glad you’ve found such a connection with my writing. I think most importantly you have to write for yourself, and then other people find value in the passion of your words 🙂

      Like

  14. Malou's Figments says:

    I love how you made this a conversation between you and anxiety. I think it’s rather relatable, as anxiety really is that voice in your head bringing you down. I especially enjoyed he end of the conversation you put in.

    ‘Hey! You’re making me sound manipulative, controlling, emotionally abusive…

    Me: …

    Anxiety: Oh.’

    Take that anxiety!

    Liked by 1 person

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